Envy and Jealousy

What they do to us…!

It’s ok to feel bad, its okay to feel bad about someone’s success ,its very common too. we call them jealousy and envy. Seems to be same but these are different. Sometimes even animals also show some kind of jealous. Jealous devours lot of space in our minds. While envious will always include social comparison and competition. These are the emotions that enables survival and keep on showing up since the cave man age.

ENVY is wanting something you don’t have. Its an active expression.

JEALOUSY is about wanting to keep or make sure you have something that already yours. Like guarding a thing from others. Jealous is a passive expression.

In brief stealing a thing from others is jealous, destroying that thing instead is envy

What they do to us

We feel threatened to think that someone else has something we deserve and want , it can bring on anger fear and violence in some cases. we experience envious of others. Its okay to be jealous and envious for some extent to increase competitive nature, fear of self abomination is also a key motivator. When we allow jealousy to take over and start to doubt, it eventually damage trust and respect. It is about feeling insecure and fear of future , as always we say its good to talk about what you are feeling.

Jealous and envy will intensify the anxiety, rage, fear, humiliation, potentially obsessive thoughts and also blinds us by altering our perception of reality.

Envy causes never ending sadness and also willing to change. Jealousy on other-hand cause collapse of relationships leading us to impulsive reckless behaviour, harming others.

How that get planted in us

Dealing with our insecurities is the most important thing , feeling bad about what we own and comparing our possession, success, growth doesn’t lead us anywhere, we cant keep on measuring our growth with others. Competition between individuals are the roots to envy and jealousy. Running towards perfectionism when we are already perfect is just a waste of time.

Overcoming jealous and envy

“Mind acts like enemy for those who cant control it”

So we have to control it before it consumes us. To overcome we should leave greed, guilt and stop comparing our growth to others we don’t know the journey, the path taken by them, everyone have their own problems and their needs . We cant just be envious and wishing their downfall because we don’t know what bring them to that position ,what they’ve sacrificed to get there. We see so many people on social media platforms, wishing that “I want to live a life like that”, “ I wish I have partner like that”, “ children who get marks like that”, “ body like that” Etc.,

Instead of comparing to others I choose to compare with myself. Like journaling where I was physically and mentally six months ago, where I want to be in next six months to what I’m willing to give how much I’m going to spend my energy, my time, my effort, and asking my self is it worth spending.

• This makes us to focus on ourselves and avoiding comparing ourselves to others. Every single of us gifted with unique abilities, skills we should focus on them.